Friday, April 4, 2008

10 Best Jokes In The World - Today Is Joke No. 2

2. Dumb Court Questions


The below excerpts appeared in the Salt Lake Tribune. They were taken from real court records and actually happened…

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Q: What happened then?

A: He told me, he says, “I have to kill you because you can identify me.”

Q: Did he kill you?

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Was it you or your brother that was killed in the war?

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The youngest son, the 20-year-old, how old is he?

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Q: She had three children, right?

A: Yes.

Q: How many were boys?

A: None.

Q: Were there any girls?

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Were you alone or by yourself?

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Q: I show you Exhibit 3 and ask you if you recognize that picture?

A: That’s me. Q: Were you present when that picture was taken?

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Were you present in court this morning when you were sworn in?

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Q: You say that the stairs went down to the basement?

A: Yes.

Q: And these stairs, did they go up also?

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Q: Now then, Mrs. Johnson, how was your first marriage terminated?

A: By death. Q: And by whose death was it terminated?

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Q: Do you know how far pregnant you are now?

A: I’ll be three months on March 12th.

Q: Apparently then, the date of conception was around January 12th?

A: Yes.

Q: What were you doing at that time?

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Do you have any children or anything of that kind?

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Was that the same nose you broke as a child?

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Q: Mrs. Jones, do you believe you are emotionally stable?

A: I used to be.

Q: How many times have you committed suicide?

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So, you were gone until you returned?

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You don’t know what it was, and you didn’t know what it looked like, but can you describe it?

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Q: Have you lived in this town all your life?

A: Not yet.

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A Texas attorney, realizing he was on the verge of unleashing a stupid question, interrupted himself and said, “Your Honor, I’d like to strike the next question.”

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Q: Do you recall approximately the time that you examined that body of Mr. Huntington at St. Mary’s Hospital?

A: It was in the evening. The autopsy started about 5:30 P.M.

Q: And Mr. Huntington was dead at the time, is that correct?

A: No, you idiot, he was sitting on the table wondering why I was performing an autopsy on him!

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Now doctor, isn’t it true that when a person dies in his sleep, in most cases he just passes quietly away and doesn’t know anything about it until the next morning?

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to think our smart lawyer... is actually that dumb....... i wonder how is our Malaysian Lawyer then.....

PJ Low

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

pj,i dun understand ur jokes need ur explain again @@ i think my english language no so good enough i need improve more ^^

Interceptors said...

hmmm... about this joke... how to explain....
i guess i should re-edit it.. then u guys might grab it better....

Interceptors said...

done... it is a "separete" jokes that combine in together... so.. it kinda confuse at the first look as i forgot to divide it...